So A Year Ago...
One year ago I got the phone call you never want. I was informed that my job was no longer my job. I guess you could say I was fired but it felt more like a ‘benching’. You know when you play in the big league for a bit and then the coach benches you to make way for a new star player? I was really happy doing my job, I’m really quite good at it and this decision didn’t make any sense to me, yet somehow, somewhere along the line, someone who I had not met, decided to give my job to someone else. How about that?
And I’m really ok with it… now.
I am writing this BLOG to encourage anyone who has had a less than awesome situation crop up, without warning or reason. I want to let you know, that the universe really has a way of showing up when you are at a loss. That has been my experience in the twelve months since that phone call.
You see, it had been a dream of mine to wind up there, hosting that show, for many years. Seven years, to be exact. Those years I spent working my guts out, boycotting holidays to fulfil another ‘opportunity to showcase my skills’ and other clichés. I was clocking up the ten thousand hour theory at a cracking pace.
And then a year ago, all of a sudden it wasn’t mine anymore. It was someone else’s and none of it really mattered anymore. Nor could I change it. I was so confused at first, I think the injustice, there was no discussion, just a click as the phone was hung up.
There is one thing I could control and I have done so each day for the last twelve months. My response; note I didn’t write my reaction? A reaction in this situation gives it power over you. I have chosen my response from a position of grace and style everyday since this part of the story began to take shape. .
Fast-forward a year and here I am. Content. Still a little baffled and bruised, but happy with my choices of navigating a tricky situation with class.
Choosing to rise above pettiness and small thinking, contributes to your character. The person I have pursued becoming this year, is a woman who I am really proud of. She has a story that she hopes will inspire you.
Up until a year ago I was heard because I had to be heard because I had to say something, anything, because there was a show to do everyday .Contributing only to the endless cycle of headlines and hopelessness.
Now I believe I have a worthy story to tell, it’s something of value, it’s a contribution.
When the rug gets astronomically ripped from under your feet, when the dust settles and the bruises fade, the ones to your ego take the longest, when it’s just you and your feelings of shame and disappointment please read this.
Your mess becomes your message. There is no fairytale. The end of one thing is absolutely the beginning of the next. You were never promised you wouldn’t go through the fire, you were promised company while you are in there. Without the test, you can’t write your testimony You are capable of handling whatever it is. Only under immense pressure can coal become a diamond
Without that phone call a year ago, there are many things that wouldn’t have unfolded this year; each one sharpening my edges, pushing me forward, helping me realise the next part of the new script that the heavens are writing.
So you see it’s impossible to be upset about something that was never in my control in the first place. Was that job ever really mine, or was I just a cog in the machine of wireless white noise?
It’s difficult some days to look at what happened a year ago as anything but a complete fail on my part, but I rise up against these small thoughts and arrive at a place where I know, moments like this, are the ones that shape us, equip us and help us secure the stepping stone to our ‘next’.
Yes it’s unfair, but if you have the right lens, you can see your moment in a brand new view and learn to be glad. Yes glad, that the universe saved you out of something that could have clipped your wings, so now you can actually fly higher than you ever thought possible.