How To Nurture Your Hustle
I am posting this Keynote I recently did at an event in Canberra. Thanks to Tanya Hennessy who encouraged me to post it, I hope it helps your Nurture Your Hustle.
I want to share my three tips for how to nurture your hustle. In this post-modern world, we are busier, more stressed with more demands on our time and unrealistic expectations to live up to. So, I thought I would take a moment to offer three things you can do, for you, to get through.
I have expressed these in reverse order of importance, mainly so that you have to read the entire post to get to the main and most important point. Here we go;
1. Be kind to yourself.
Be the kind of person, who is a kind person. Sometimes our number one enemy is, no, not the roll of cling wrap amid the early morning scramble to get out the door. It’s US! It’s easy to be down on ourselves, we can struggle to sit at the table. Not the breakfast table, in my experience, I have never had an issue saddling up to a bowl of oats no matter how early it is. I mean the ‘table’. You know like the ‘glass-ceiling’ that exists, it’s unseen like a unicorn but unmissable like an active wear sale. Unmissable.
I think we often put our needs last and yes, sometimes, we need to make way for our responsibilities before our own needs. But we often lost this battle by overlooking our needs and relinquishing power.
If someone compliments you on your epic tights, own it, claim it, say ‘Thank You’ and you can slap your own ass and smile; just as an example. Try not to dismiss a compliment with a, ‘oh these old things’ or ‘I wish I was 5 kilos lighter, then they might look epic.’ We need to accept compliments without fobbing them off. That is a gesture of kindness to yourself.
Side note: If you’re reading this and you’re an asshole, you probably don’t get many compliments, so best you accept the few you’ll get.
Kindness is a skill. Much like putting on eye liner with one hand in a moving taxi. It takes practise, precision and dedication to get it on point. So, practise kindness on yourself, or complete strangers. (Note: practise kindness with strangers not applying eye liner). Being kind to others will require you to pause, assess and respond. Rather than just react, especially if someone isn’t being kind which all the assholes reading this will be well informed about and potentially responsible for. Responding with kindness is our best shot at being our best, showing up as our best and encouraging others to do so. And it starts with you. If you struggle with your mental health, ask for help. If you need support for your idea, rally your friends. If you are not coping, reach out. If you need a break, take one. Talking honestly and openly with somebody about where you are at, is a kindness to yourself. Put a team around you in place to help you to be kind to you.
When you are on a plane, and the safety demonstration is happening, do you recall what the instructions are about the oxygen masks? Secure your mask first before attending to others! We need to adopt this as a way of life. You need to look after you, your mental health, your nutrition, your body, your brain so you can show up for others. If we each made one choice each day to be the kind of person who is a kind person, to yourself first, I think the world would start to be a little bit better.
I love what Beyoncé says, ‘I don’t think your ready for this jelly,’ which is true and totally irrelevant. No, I meant the other thing Beyoncé says, ‘Power is not given to you, you have to take it.’ The best way to take your power, it to take some ‘you time’ and be kind to you.
Be a kind human.
Seeing as we are all an integral part of humankind.
2. Fail and grow
Can we remove the stigma around success and failure? Cool thanks. Failing is a part of success, without failure we are unable to identify our success. As Yin doesn’t exist without Yang. As Salt goes with Pepper and as Kim is to Kanye. Failing is a part of life, we need to embrace it, be ok with it and learn to support each other through it rather than let it rob us of the future success that awaits.
Learning the lesson from a fail will help us redesign our plan to get us closer to our goals. So, pay attention and if you fail, welcome to the club, I’m the president.
Failing doesn’t just stay in the bubble of business. What if your first marriage fails (I’ve been there) or you buy a dud investment property based on some terrible investment advice (I’ve also been there) or what if you think wearing leg warmers as a thirty-year-old woman, over your jeans in winter, is ‘a trend you can start’ (sadly I’ve been there too) and there is most likely physical evidence on Instagram. These are all epic fails, and along with the fail, came a great lesson. Learn the lesson. Pay attention and do the work to correct your course, have your edges sharpened and grow from the experience.
I love what Jay Z says, ‘Now can I get an encore, do you want more, cooking raw with the Brooklyn boy’ which has nothing to do with this BLOG, I love the other thing he says, ‘I will not lose, for even in defeat, there’s a valuable lesson learned, so it evens up for me.’
Fail and Grow.
It’s like the Bend and Snap for your mental health.
3. Find your Why
Without a purpose, we perish. I am hot on purpose these days. Most people are caught up in ‘what’ they do. And I get it. It’s usually the second question we ask people.
Hey I’m Maz, how are you today? So, what do you do? Is a pretty normal way to introduce yourself. The issue here, is that no one is talking about why they do what they do, no one is articulating the purpose behind their choices to do what they do. This I believe we have back to front.
I worked in media, in radio and TV for over a decade and I loved it. I kicked ass at it. But I can’t tell you why. Other than I was very good at it, I loved it, I got promoted and paid loads to do it…. But I don’t know why. So, after I was kicked out of the radio club, I had a fair bit of time on my hands to figure out what the hell I am doing on this planet. This I believe is each person’s responsibility to figure out. After some therapy, the help of a few good books and a decent Ted Talk binge, I figured it out.
To lead and empower people to be great humans. Or words to that effect.
So now that I have my purpose down pat, what I actually do either aligns with my purpose or I pass.
For example, interviewing Channing Tatum about his pants dropping act in Magic Mike was a flippin surreal experience. I hosted the red-carpet premiere of the movie, we chatted, it was great. Did it change anyone’s lives? Probably not. Writing about my experiences and encouraging people to keep moving forward through the fire, sharing powerful story with honesty and integrity... hopefully, that’s going to inspire someone to do someone incredible. And that feels better than Channing Tatum… if you know what I mean.
When you have a purpose behind what you are doing, the actual ‘thing’ becomes the less important part of the equation, as long as it serves your purpose it should be considered, if it doesn’t then it shouldn’t. This can be tricky for some people who make choices based on how it makes them feel or whether they will get retweeted, which is a lot of us and it’s ok! When you know better, do better. So, go on a journey and seek out why on Earth you are on this Earth and then do whatever is it to make it your daily. That’s the point.
I love what Eminem says, ‘God gave you one pair of shoes, better put them on.’ He also said, ‘My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips and if I get lucky you might give it a little kiss.’ So there’s that.
In Summary in reverse order;
Figure out your WHY
Fail and grow
Be kind to yourself.
That’ a solid start to nurturing your hustle and finding your way back in the dark.